part v: One hundred and fifty two things that can go wrong on a shoot

How many things can go wrong on a shoot... My photographer friend Lucy told me that David Bailey and Richard Avedon starting listing them and gave up once they got to 150. I tried to verify the truth of this anectdote but my research yielded nothing. It was probably some bullshit story that Lucy's photography tutor made up to scare her into being 'ultra-prepared' which is no bad thing if it works. 

It seemed to work for Lucy: it instilled in her a paranoia that meant she even backed up the back up camera. Saved her bacon on a couple of occasions too.

But check this...

I'm supposed to shoot (for a Busness Magazine) the CEO of a large respected corporation. He is being interviwed by a respected journalist from a very respected newspaper and my brief is too depict that interview as it happens. You know, the kind of fly on the wall thing capturing all the emotions and reactions of the interviewee in response to the questions... and to shoot some wide aperture shots over the interviewers shoulder so that there's some perspective... 

Kinda important that the journalist doing the interview shows up, No! I thought so too, but not the journalist. He decides on the morning  that he wants to do a phone interview instead. Doesn't matter to him that the format of the feature requires that he be there in the room in the pictures... No! He wants to do a phoner.

And guess what? When I ring through the palava to the magazine they still want me to go ahead with the shoot and suggest I ask the CEO to pretend that he's being interviewed. Yeah right, you can imagine it...

"Excuthe me Mr CEO will you just sit down there and talk to your imaginary friend while I photograph it."

"Ok." He agrees. Can you believe it. Tuns out to be a real nice bloke too, and so we have a laugh and make a joke about this ludicrous situation we find ourselves in and I get a good feeling all is going to be well, when I discover the problem with the power supply to the boardroom. After a couple of shots my flash heads won't work I try all the other sockets, I swap flash heads, swap synch leads... same shit.

I curse under my breath and ask why? why? why? With no assistant (really low budget couldn't afford to take one) I have to figure this one out alone and pretty fast. Fortunately I have been schooled in the Lucy school of paranoia: so despite taking enough lights and softboxes to do a Vanity Fair cover gatefold, I had still packed my trusty portable 580ex flashgun. It doesn't look impressive but it packs enough of a punch and fortunately I manage to get the shots I need.

Paranoia can be a beautiful thing.

This week Erroll; Watched American Gangster and listed a load of underused photographic equipment for sale on ebay. Get a bargain.